Polls Suck!

I just remembered I was going to do a poll, but after several attempts, I can't figure the fucker out. *sigh*

Anyway, just put your answer(s) in the Comments section. You can be anonymous if you like. I've never logged IPs, either.

What do you think should be carved on my tombstone?

Free Will Astrology

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): You've been blessed and cursed with arduous
lessons these past months, Libra. They have compelled you to navigate
your way through the most challenging archetypes of all: death and
rebirth. Before these trials, you may have considered yourself smart and
capable but wondered how strong you were. Now there is no doubt: You're
more courageous than you ever imagined. But don't stop pushing yourself
to the limit yet. Your hero's journey still has a few weeks to go. Keep
doing what you've been doing, only more so.

Greeeaaat... No rest for the wicked!

I Think I Used to Have This Bear...

	Love-a-Lot Bear You love to take care of others and people love being around you because you make them feel appreciated. You are very sweet and soft-spoken. You are also a romantic and consider yourself an excellent matchmaker, so you tend to be a bit nosy. But everyone still considers you the sweetest person they know.
Take the Which Care Bear Are You? Quiz!

Depressed and Angry Ranting/Rambling

Well, I've just spent the past few hours on the phone to various people. Just because I'm really pissed at the FUCKING CUNT from BellSouth I just spoke to, I'm going to share all the excruciating details with all of you unfortunate bastards. You've been warned.

First phone call was to AT&T Wireless, since my phone's been fucking up for about a week now. After a long time on the phone with tech support (or whatever it's called for a phone company), they said they did some stuff which might or might not work, but I won't know if it has until 6pm tonight at the latest. As of now, there's no indication that it's working.

I had them pass me along to billing, 'cause I know I owe them a lot of money (they combined a couple of bills on me, so I wasn't able to put off the one that's no longer applicable, and most difficult to pay). They weren't able to work with me much, and knowing what my next few paychecks are going to be, there's no way I can pay them in time on my own. And, with our cell phones being our only method of contact for prospective employers, we can't afford to lose them. I was left with a deal of about $350 for the next two Fridays, which I can't afford this Friday for sure, and not likely to be able to afford next Friday, either. Joy.

I tried to call the HR person at Red Cross a few times, 'cause she's been handling my COBRA stuff for vision and dental. After the vision fiasco a few weeks back (they had cancelled our coverage, even though we'd been paying for it... of course, we didn't find that out until AFTER we'd done the eye doctor thing, to the tune of just over a thousand dollars), I wanted to make sure my dental insurance was still working.

Since I couldn't get a hold of her, I called BCBS directly, and found that, indeed, our coverage had been cut off at the same time the vision insurance was cut off.

I eventually got a hold of the HR chick, who promised to fix it, and she would get back to me in a couple of days. I told her I'd be in the office soon to make a payment, anyway, so I'd see her then, if she didn't call. This is my way of keeping them on their toes, 'cause I don't trust them any farther than I can throw them after the way they fired me. Plus, the fact that the insurance was cancelled in the first place doesn't help me to trust them any more. Granted, the HR lady has always been extremely nice and helpful to me. (Nor was she the one who was involved in the firing.)

Since I had all my insurance cards in hand, I made a call to BCBS medical, since Mariner (who I haven't worked for in over a year) sent me medical cards. They're dicks, too, and I'm broke, so I'm more than willing to exploit their mistake if they haven't caught it. Unfortunately, they had. No free medical insurance for me. It was worth a shot.

I also checked the pharmaceutical coverage I had with Red Cross. I've never been clear on whether that's covered by COBRA or not. According to them, I have been cancelled, but it was at the same time that the vision and dental were cancelled, so I'm still not sure. So, I'll check that when I talk to HR in the near future.

I called the pre-paid legal services I had through Red Cross, to see if I was still covered (they keep sending me mail). I wasn't, but they do individual coverage, so I had them send me information on that, and a bill and whatnot. Heh. I'll probably need legal coverage soon, if only to declare bankruptcy, which I SOOOO do not want to do.

I also called the wife of a client I worked with before, 'cause she has dental connections. We'd like to use the dentist that simplysakka works for, but we owe them more money than we can pay them anytime in the near future, and because of that, it doesn't matter that we have dental insurance. Ditto for the dentist blckwngdorcl used to go to before that. She gave me a lot of good information, and I had a good talk with her, so that was the highlight of my phone day.

I also called my parents. Partially 'cause (what turned out to be) BellSouth somehow got their phone number, and called there looking for Glenn. We owe BellSouth money, too. I got the number from Mom, who'd taken the original call (and, God love her, wouldn't give them my contact information). I asked to talk to my dad, and asked about putting at least one of the wireless bill payments on his credit card. He agreed, somewhat reluctantly, and I can't say I blame him. The obnoxious vision bill had ended up on his card, too (although I went immediately the next day and handled all that, including getting the reimbursement form filled out and in the mail - but I haven't heard anything back yet), as well as all the car stuff I mentioned the other day. None of that stuff can be put off, and I don't know where else to get money from at this point. I HATE doing this.

So, after that, I called BellSouth. Ms. Wilson was a royal cunt to me. She hung up on me without telling me my options, other than wage garnishing, so I called her back, and made her give me options. I told her to set me up with her plan, although I don't know if I can pull off paying it. Everything rides on me and/or Glenn getting more/better jobs in the VERY NEAR future. It's not like we haven't been looking.

So, anyway, I don't know whether to beat the shit out of something, or burst into tears. We've been living this way so long I have trouble seeing a way out of it. Learned helplessness. Joy.

And just a note. This is my journal, so I tend to use first person singular a lot, but blckwngdorcl has been with me through all this, and doing what he can, too. Sometimes, I think, I don't give him enough credit. He's been wonderful throughout it all. It just that... "it all" still sucks.

Blargh!

(Check with fornorald for correct spelling on that. I think it's a trademarked term...)

Well, I'm in one of those moods. Those moods where I'm restless, but don't want to do anything. And, frankly, even if I did, we're broke, and blckwngdorcl has the car tonight. So, either way, I'm fucked.

I think... and this is the first time this has ever come to me... that the reason I'm restless is 'cause I'm depressed and angry about the money situation. (See what I said about pot/kettle, elorie? How fucking obvious is that ridiculous little revelation I just had? *sigh*) Anyway, I think that I'm depressed, deep down (who wouldn't be... and anyone who's studied that sort of thing knows that anger is just a mask for depression, anyway), but I don't want to go into the doldrums of that, and since I suck at anger, which is probably closer to what I'm feeling at this moment, I'm left with this irritable restlessness. I don't suppose it helps that I just made some coffee... but... mmmmm.... coffee... amaretto flavored. My favorite, next to the cinnamon nut struesel that I used to get from Gloria Jeans... although I often gave in to Frog and did the toasted almond creme. *sigh* I miss Frog. I miss those weekends, all of us sitting around, waking up every Sunday whenever we felt like it, curling up and watching The Real World, and drinking coffee. I always had good coffee, too. And I still make coffee the way Frog taught me to begin with - two Frog-sized handfuls of beans into the grinder. I've since learned that it's the same as where the silver ends in the grinder. To this day, I can never remember how much of the pre-ground stuff to use. Usually, I'll cheat by pouring the ground coffee into the grinder until it hits the right level. And I'm quite incapable (and have no desire to be capable) of making anything less than one whole pot of coffee at a time.

I'm rambling aren't I? Oh, well. Deal with it. I already warned you that I was in a mood. *ICP voice* Fuckoff!

See, I'm kinda in the mood to go off on a rant (worthy of bulwerk), but that just ties in to the whole anger thing, and my body gets an inkling of that, and literally shuts down that response. I get an overwhelming sense of "why bother?", and I don't. (Bother, that is.)

See, there are a few things I could write about... the one that's closest to my mind right now is depressing, and I'd rather not go there, when I'm so close to that already. The quasi-ranty stuff, I'm just not in the mood for.

*sigh* I have nothing useful to say. We now return you to your regularly scheduled programming.

Oh, Yeah...

I do know one thing I can do, that's pretty neutral, content wise... It's actually that post I attempted to make a few weeks back, that was godawful long, and got eaten... as a result, I'm going to make 10 separate posts instead of one long one, so if I lose something, it's not so much.

Anyway, remember that quiz thingy I did a while back? I don't think a lot of people took it, 'cause waterfall_sh found a virus in it, but I've been meaning to post the answers.

So, that will be the subject of my next 10 posts. Lucky you. You've been warned.

Quiz Question #1

What is bookofmirrors real name?

A. Krista Lynn McCormick
B. K'La Albertini
C. Krista Lynn Fleming
D. all of the above, at one time or another

Answer: D

My parents named me Krista Lynn Fleming, which is the name on my birth certificate, my high school diploma, and my diploma from U of I. (1968-1992)

I got married to my first husband in 1992, and took his name, which made my Krista Lynn McCormick. This is the name on that marriage license, and my practical nursing certification. (1992-1995)

I went back to my maiden name after the divorce. (1995-2003) When I met blckwngdorcl, I kept getting mixed up with waterfall_sh (even though she spells her name wrong). She tried to go by her craft name, but she was already well-known in the community, so that really didn't work. I happened to be writing down my initials one day, and noticed they made a cool name. I was pretty much all about change when I moved down here, so I started going by K'La. (2001-present) I made it legal in February of 2003.

A couple of notes on the name thing...

Because I was adopted, I always kinda wondered what my birth parent(s) would have named me. My biological father was never really in the picture, and I learned from my biological mother that she didn't really think about names, 'cause she never wanted to get that attached to me. She said that, if she had thought of it, she probably would have named me Star. Which is a pretty fucking cool name (especially since her last name was Wood). However, as I was growing up, everyone and their brother used to call me Kathy(Cathy). Don't ask me why. It doesn't sound anything like Krista. Even in Spanish class, she gave me the name Catalina instead of Cristina, even when there were no other Cath- or Kris- derivatives in the class. So, I had always been convinced that Nano had intended to name me Cathy, and that people had just picked up on that. She *did* tell me that her best friend back then was named Cathy, but I think that's stretching it a bit to make that significant.

Quiz Question #2

(On an unrelated note - All hail simplysakka, the bearer of free turkey sandwiches!)

What's bookofmirrors idea of a perfect date?

A. dinner and a movie - she's boring that way
B. attending a sports event - football, baby!
C. visiting family
D. museums or theme parks

Answer: A

Definitely A. If the movie ends up being a play, or a musical, all the better.

My second choice would be museums and theme parks. There's a metaphysical museum in Chicago that I've always wanted to go to.

Visiting family is third, for date purposes. I love my family, and miss them more than I thought I would, being down here. I love Glenn's family, too, even if I have to be in the broom closet over there. But definitely not my first choice of a date.

Sports are WAY down on the list. I do like watching sports, but only if it's live, and football is my favorite of those things. I was in Block I (that's I as in Illinois, not I as in the Roman numeral 1) in college, so I went to all the home games. We were the ones the had the pretty-colored placards that we flashed up to make big pictures. That was pretty fun. Wrestling is pretty fun, too, although I don't consider it a sport - more like soap opera for guys. And soft porn. ;)

Quiz Question #3

How many states has bookofmirrors lived in?

A. 1
B. 2
C. 3
D. 4

Answer: D

I lived in Indiana (Warsaw) from birth till we moved in the middle of my freshman year of high school.

I lived in South Carolina (Spartanburg) from then until the summer before my senior year of high school. I will note that no one who has never lived in a state that has a corresponding state on the opposite compass point (North/South Carolina, North/South Dakota, etc.) ever seems to really get the two straight, or care to.

We moved to Illinois (Dwight) just before my senior year of high school. I lived in Dwight until 2000, unless you count living in Champaign during the 1987-1991 school years while I went to college. I lived in... let's see... the apartment we lived in while the house was being built... the house that eventually got built (a mirror image of our house in South Carolina)... the apartment I lived in with Leo... the apartment we had to get because our landlord got Alzheimers, and his dickhead son kicked us out... the apartment we had to get 'cause those landlords apparently didn't believe us when we told them there would be people there constantly, at all hours of the day and night ("Yeah, we know you told us it would be like this, but we didn't think it would be like this.")... the apartment that Fig and I moved into when Mark and Kristi moved out, and we could no longer afford the aparment we were in... that apartment was when I moved away from Dwight, and ended up in Bourbonnais.

I moved to Georgia in 2000. I've lived in Atlanta, Marietta, back to Atlanta, back to Marietta, which is where I am now.

Quiz Question #4

How many siblings does bookofmirrors have?

A. none - she's an only child
B. two - sisters
C. three - 2 of one and 1 of the other (gender)
D. all of the above

Answer: D

Yes, D. How can that be so, you ask? Well, partially 'cause I realized after I made the test that answer C isn't quite accurate, but A and B are, so you're still stuck with D by default.

Let me explain...

A is correct because Nano, my biological mother, never had any more children.

B is correct because my family (adoptive) had 2 daughters before I came along. (Both their biological children. Not that it matters to me, but a lot of people ask.)

C is correct because Marty, my biological father, had 3 other children, with gender as stated above (read as, I can't remember what one of them is...). This is the tricky one, 'cause that would really make them half-siblings.

So, D it is!

I got a lot of people on that one. ;) Although most of you did put B, which probably would have been the logical answer, if you weren't thinking in the twisted way I was.

Quiz Question #5

How many tattoos does bookofmirrors have?

A. 0
B. 5
C. 10
D. too many to count

Answer: B

My first tattoo is a phoenix, like the symbol Jean Grey has on her chest in X-Men. It's on my sternum. It represents my relationship with logomancer. (There's a reason why it was appropriate at the time, but I don't think it applies any longer, as his beliefs have changed.)

My second tattoo is a Simba (the tribal one like Raffiki drew on the tree). It's on my outer left ankle. It represents my cat Mika, who died. He was Neg's brother, and looked very similar to Neg. He was scared to death by a friendly, but boisterous, rottweiler. Like all cats, he had several names in addition to his official name, a couple of which involved the word "lion", so the tattoo seemed fitting.

(Note: When Neg dies, I'm going to get a rainbow on the other ankle.)

My third tattoo is a black and purple yin-yang on the right side of my neck. This represents my relationship with Fig. He always wore a yin-yang necklace, and all my stuff was purple, and all his stuff was black.

My fourth tattoo is what The Pyramid Collection calls an All-Are-One symbol. I'd include a link to it, but they no longer sell it, and their site doesn't have deep links, anyway. It's a pentacle, with other symbols between the points of the star - an equal-armed cross, a star of David, an ohm, a triskele, and a yin-yang. I call it my "why can't we all just get along?" symbol. It doesn't represent anyone in particular, except maybe me. :)

My fifth (and sixth, kinda, since I had to have it redone) tattoo is a blue triangle (pointing distally) on my left third finger. It represents my relationship with Leo. I got it 5 years after the divorce, when he and I came to terms with each other. It only seemed right that he get a tattoo, too. It was a significant relationship. It is what it is because our wedding rings were silver and turquoise, alternating triangles. There was one triangle that fell out during our honeymoon. We were in Branson, Missouri at that tourist trap place I can't think of the name of right now, and there was a guy there that was selling semi-precious stones, including turquoise. He replaced my lost stone for the cost of a smile (although I think I gave him a kiss as a tip). After that, I always made sure that stone was in the middle, with the point proximal. I made it backwards for the tattoo, mostly 'cause it just looked better, and partially to denote the change in the relationship.

Note: blckwngdorcl and I want tattoos for us, too. Left upper arm matching tattoos... a band with a black and a green snake, intertwining, and an emblem in the middle with a cougar print, and two feathers (raven and golden eagle) hanging from it. His totems are the snake and the raven, mine are the cougar and the golden eagle. The snakes are black and green 'cause his birthstone is the emerald, and mine is an opal, and I prefer black opals (which is the main stone in his wedding ring). So far, unfortunately, it's been way down on the financial priority list. One can't skimp on ink - it's there forever.

Quiz Question #6

bookofmirrors has petted which of the following (living) animals?

A. dog, cat, bird, sea cucumber
B. horse, cow, sheep, conch
C. lion, tiger, wolf, shark
D. all of them

Answer: D


This is my favorite question - the question I've had in my head to ask for forever if I ever got around to making one of these quizzes.

A - I grew up with dogs. Schnauzers, mostly. I've had cats since I moved out of the house. I've babysat birds before, and there's a macaw (I think) at the petstore in Warsaw that I always pet when I'm there. So, of course I've petted all those. The sea cucumber is due to this place in Key West, Florida, where we used to go every winter through about 6th grade. It was an aquarium with a touch tank. I got to touch a lot of marine life there.

B - I owned a horse for a while, but I had already petted several at the fair. Remember, I grew up in the Midwest, so the county fair was chock-full of livestock of just about every kind, so horses, cows, and sheep were easy to pet. The conch is from the same aquarium and touch tank in Key West.

C - This is my favorite. Little known K'La trivia. :) The lion and the tiger were both cubs, actually. There was a travelling something-or-other at HillCrest mall in South Carolina when we went back to visit once, and they had them there. You paid money to hold them, and get your picture taken. And yes, I still have the pictures. Looking back now, I feel kinda bad, 'cause I imagine that it wasn't the best life for them. I hope they were treated well. They didn't look sick, or act afraid, though. The wolf is a cool story. My first husband was a freak about wolves, so for his birthday, I bought him a year's membership to Wolf Park in Lafayette, Indiana. Part of the type of membership I bought him included the opportunity to go meet the wolf he sponsored. I got the alpha male, 'cause that just fit Leo's personality, and I packed Leo up for the long drive to the surprise destination to go see the wolves. We had a special appointment, 'cause his birthday was in December, and the park was generally closed. We got out there, and they brought out Aurora, who was the lowest ranking in the pack, but the friendliest. They wanted to work us up to the alpha male, I think, and also to get the wolves that appeared interested in coming out. After that, they brought Altair, the alpha female. Now, keep in mind, we had just read and signed the rules for interacting with the wolves, which included not letting the wolves lick you. Altair, however, didn't seem to have read the rules, 'cause she started licking my face. At that point, I really wasn't about to tell her no. Besides, I thought it was pretty fucking cool. But seriously, what was I supposed to do at that point? I think they quietly got her to stop, but it was still pretty cool. Chinook, the alpha male, did make his way out finally, and we both petted him, including a belly rub. That was pretty fucking cool, too. I ended up getting a membership for myself after that visit, and sponsored Altair. (Note: I checked the website to see if I could link to pictures of Chinook, Altair, or Aurora, but none of them are there. I imagine they're all dead by now, which is sad. They do have some of Chinook and Altair's pups, though. Miska looks the most like her parents, in my opinion.

The shark was at the same aquarium in Key West, although NOT in the touch tank. They kept a bunch of nurse sharks in a shallow pool, and would give tours of the place at regular intervals. Part of the tour included a guy taking one of the sharks out of the tank, holding it by the tail, and walking around to let people pet it. He said that the texture of the shark's skin had most often been associated with the feel of women's nylon stockings, and I'd have to agree with that. The guy claimed that the skin of the shark was (if I remember the term correctly) dermadental, which meant that his teeth and his skin were made out of the same thing, and that, when you touched a shark, he could taste you. Every time the shark tried to bite someone who touched him, the guy said that that person must taste good. I don't know if that's true or not, but the shark *did* try to bite me. ;)

Quiz Question #7

bookofmirrors is a...

A. top
B. bottom
C. switch
D. none, thank you very much

Answer: B

Everyone except blckwngdorcl picked switch for this! What's up with that?!!? I actually gave fesser partial credit for it, since, in some of our online scenes, I've dommed women for him, so I could see how he might get that. But I'm a bottom, honest! What is it you people see that I don't?

Note: I could be sub to either a man or a woman. And I could top a woman. But I don't think I could ever do it to a man. To me, there's a beauty in BDSM, a sense of cherishing the slave, and the gift of submission. In all the F/m femdom I've read about (and that is, granted, the extent of my knowledge of it), there's a sense of contempt for the slave. I could never be that way. If there was a sense of cherishing the male sub, I might be able to do that... but... face it... females in that state are just breathtakingly beautiful. I have a hard time feeling that way about men in that state. (No offense meant to those who can... hell, I'd love to hear other takes on it.)

Quiz Question #8

What did bookofmirrors want to be when she grew up?

A. veterinarian
B. nurse
C. ballerina
D. scientist

Answer: C

No one got this right. But yeah, it's true. I wanted to be that beautiful, that lithe, that graceful. Still do.

And toe shoes are dead sexy.

Quiz Question #9

What did bookofmirrors do from 06/25/2004 to 06/27/2004 that she's never done before?

A. spent the weekend purging her fear of heights - bungee jumping, hang gliding, etc.
B. did volunteer work for the Gay Pride parade
C. practiced naturism (nudity) in a public place
D. 3-day spa experience, courtesy of 99X contest

Answer: C

The record of that event is here.

I AM afraid of heights, for the record, and the Gay Pride parade was that weekend, and I would do volunteer work for it... as far as D goes - I wish.

Quiz Question #10

Last one, boys and girls. :)

bookofmirrors had a unique physical trait at one time. What was it?

A. she could turn her tongue upside down
B. she had a third nipple
C. she could blow air out of her eye
D. she could pop her left shoulder out of the socket

Answer: C

Out of my tear ducts, to be precise. I don't know why I could do it, or why I can no longer do it. It was my Stupid Human Trick claim to fame, such as it was. I would plug my nose, shut my mouth tight, and blow, and air would come out my tear ducts. It was pretty fuckin' cool (or gross, depending on your point of view).

I know people who have the traits of A and B, though. ;)