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bookofmirrorsOK, 
Profundis, I just figured out why you should make 
BearPawsMassage a community - I could have posted the relevant portions of this post there. Phhbbt. (Feel free to post, use, or otherwise pimp this out. Edit as needed, as long as you only delete and don't change what I say. Y'know, unless you use those [punctuation marks that seem to indicate that this isn't really what the person said].)
Anyway, yesterday was my first day back at Sedona as a part-time employee. Things went well, even with two clients at the end of the day who were reputed to be difficult. *shrug* The mother liked me, anyway, and the daughter seemed to like her nurse. Lots of miscommunication on every side, causing frustration for all. Everyone a little to blame, and all that. At any rate, their treatments were completed, somewhat more painfully, but much more on time. We'll see what happens.
After work, I had planned to go get a massage fromProfundis; I've been in pain lately, and haven't made it to the chiropractor as much as I should.
(Note to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
karlita - I definitely wanna take you up on your desire to massage all your friends/acquaintences, and soon!!)
I got out of work earlier than I expected, so that left some time, during which I grabbed something light to eat (and proved to myself that, yes, the idea of drinking something peanut butter flavored is just too icky for words) and wandered over to the Barnes and Noble on Barrett Parkway. I'd forgotten my book (Danse Macabre is out! Have you read it yet,lord_ukko?) that I was in the middle of, so I helped myself to one of their copies, and, unable to find a squishychair, curled up on the floor in an out-of-the-way corner, and had time to finish it and wander around a little before Profundis called and said he was ready.
So, headed over there, and did the massage thing.
I had a massage with him when he was completing his training, and needed hours of experience. I think the combination of him fitting into his massage skin, and my view of it more as a social call made that experience less than it could have been (but still good). I was in a different headspace this time, and he's really grown into his own. I readkarlita's fabulous descriptions about her massages, and how it makes her feel, and I can tell there's definitely some of that going on for him, too. And I was in a much better headspace to receive it, as well. I didn't feel like I needed to catch up on our respective lives, and I could just lay there and enjoy it. I think talking to him on the phone yesterday while I was setting it up helped; we'd already covered most things.
I went in with most a tight neck, especially on my left side, which was limiting some movement, and causing me pain. I also really wanted him to do some myofascial release on my shoulder/traps, 'cause I've found that, even in my most "relaxed" state, I draw my shoulders up. I think I mentioned that in ...well, never mind - I just went looking for the entry I thought I made on my experiences in the sensory dep tank a few months ago, and I couldn't find it, so apparently, I didn't make one. Anyway, the short version of the story is, while completely "relaxed" and floating, I could feel my shoulders drawn up so much I felt like I had wings. So, anyway, I wanted to work on that, 'cause they seemed stuck in that position, so I figured the fascia were stuck.
So, the moment I laid on the table (face-down), I all the sudden felt this huge tightness in my trapezoid muscle, ESPECIALLY on my right side. I mean, I know those muscles are tight on me, but this was just crazyinsane tight, and it hurt. While he was feeling me out, those areas hurt like hell. Y'know, in that way that you kinda want things to hurt, 'cause they're being worked on, but fucking OUCH. So, he went to do the release on my shoulders. That was a lovely feeling. I could feel these really strong vibrations the whole time, and wasn't sure if they were physical or energetic, or some combination of the two, but it felt good, tingly, electric. He did this for a while, and commented on the heat/energy rising from my back. He then started working on my back.
That muscle on my right was just excruciating. He reminded me that he could work it all day, but unless I let him in, it wasn't going to work. So, I tried really hard to concentrate on my breathing, to remember to breath at all, to consciously try to let the energy flow. I tried to allow myself to make noise with it, crying out when it hurt. Always that is difficult for me, and is a huge part of Core - not keeping quiet. So, I tried, and was able to do some release that way. He used a heated percussion massager in that area for a long time, and that was pretty cool, and between all of it, it did seem to help. I noted that it being right-sided was probably telling, 'cause all the issues in my life now are about men. It also didn't escape either of us that this was the first time I'd been inside his house since
Logomancer chose to sever me from his life, and since he'd moved out of that house; I had certainly felt twinges, although the energy and the scent of the house are completely different now. Anyway, he worked on that area for a while, and I felt some release. It felt like fear to me, that area. That was the emotion elicited. The left side, while not nearly as tight, and not hurting as much, felt more like anger. The whole time I was on the table, these hurt. Less and less as time went on, of course, but it never fully went away. Trying to move made it worse.
When he started working on my neck, the pain that had been there, and been a concern of mine wasn't even there. Hadn't been since I'd laid down, in fact. It was a nice relaxing massage there. I could feel things loosening, but nothing like fighting against the steel on my right side.
Since he'd spent the huge majority of a 90-minute session trying to deal with my right side, there wasn't much time for anything else, so I asked him to focus on my jaw when he flipped me over, since that was always an issue for me. Again, a big thing in Core - the jaw clenching in anger, in holding back the unsaid. Huge issue of mine. So, he did. There was definite loosening there.
When I got off the table, the pain in my back disappeared, and still hasn't come back. And it wasn't there until I got on the table. I'm not sure what that means. Mimicking the position, and the moves that caused pain during that time haven't elicited that pain again. But, the second I got off the table, the neck pain came back. I think that's just WEIRD.
On the way home, I was singing along to the radio, as I do, and tried working on opening my jaw, my voice, rather than holding it back. I was actually able to do it a couple of times. I was appalled, really. I'd gotten so used to the sound of my voice repressed, when it wasn't, it was startling to me. But, while there was a quality of openness to it that frightened me (too much energy! eek!), there was also a hoarseness about it, like there would be if one hadn't spoken in a very long time. That's kinda scary to me.
On the way home, I was hungry, and a little voice told me to go to Return to Eden, which is somewhere I rarely go, since Whole Foods is closer, and has that thing where I refill my 5-gallon water bottles. I'm not sure what I was supposed to find there, other than a FABULOUS selection of locally-made raw foods. I must go back and learn more about this. I'm really interested in pursuing that, but finances have very much gotten in the way of that. I need to figure out a way to make it a priority. With much skepticism I bought the raw version of salmon patties, which, while I wouldn't really compare them to salmon, were pretty good. I got a few other things, too, which were also good, and some wheatgrass for the cats. I then came home and ate while I surfed, watched some TV, and went to bed. (I had last night off.)
Today, I'm supposed to be calling
Dai_Syn, but I'm loathe to do so until I know for sure he's awake; the blonde beastie didn't get home until about 3am, and 
LuneNoire is still gone, presumably because of a flat tire that happened unexpectedly last night, that is being dealt with today. This may also affect whether or not Dai_Syn is available, so I'm just kinda hanging loose. I need to do laundry, at any rate, so I'll probably start that.
Anyway, that's pretty much it for me right now. Have a lovely one.
Profundis, I just figured out why you should make BearPawsMassage a community - I could have posted the relevant portions of this post there. Phhbbt. (Feel free to post, use, or otherwise pimp this out. Edit as needed, as long as you only delete and don't change what I say. Y'know, unless you use those [punctuation marks that seem to indicate that this isn't really what the person said].)Anyway, yesterday was my first day back at Sedona as a part-time employee. Things went well, even with two clients at the end of the day who were reputed to be difficult. *shrug* The mother liked me, anyway, and the daughter seemed to like her nurse. Lots of miscommunication on every side, causing frustration for all. Everyone a little to blame, and all that. At any rate, their treatments were completed, somewhat more painfully, but much more on time. We'll see what happens.
After work, I had planned to go get a massage from
Profundis; I've been in pain lately, and haven't made it to the chiropractor as much as I should.(Note to
karlita - I definitely wanna take you up on your desire to massage all your friends/acquaintences, and soon!!)I got out of work earlier than I expected, so that left some time, during which I grabbed something light to eat (and proved to myself that, yes, the idea of drinking something peanut butter flavored is just too icky for words) and wandered over to the Barnes and Noble on Barrett Parkway. I'd forgotten my book (Danse Macabre is out! Have you read it yet,
lord_ukko?) that I was in the middle of, so I helped myself to one of their copies, and, unable to find a squishychair, curled up on the floor in an out-of-the-way corner, and had time to finish it and wander around a little before Profundis called and said he was ready. So, headed over there, and did the massage thing.
I had a massage with him when he was completing his training, and needed hours of experience. I think the combination of him fitting into his massage skin, and my view of it more as a social call made that experience less than it could have been (but still good). I was in a different headspace this time, and he's really grown into his own. I read
karlita's fabulous descriptions about her massages, and how it makes her feel, and I can tell there's definitely some of that going on for him, too. And I was in a much better headspace to receive it, as well. I didn't feel like I needed to catch up on our respective lives, and I could just lay there and enjoy it. I think talking to him on the phone yesterday while I was setting it up helped; we'd already covered most things. I went in with most a tight neck, especially on my left side, which was limiting some movement, and causing me pain. I also really wanted him to do some myofascial release on my shoulder/traps, 'cause I've found that, even in my most "relaxed" state, I draw my shoulders up. I think I mentioned that in ...well, never mind - I just went looking for the entry I thought I made on my experiences in the sensory dep tank a few months ago, and I couldn't find it, so apparently, I didn't make one. Anyway, the short version of the story is, while completely "relaxed" and floating, I could feel my shoulders drawn up so much I felt like I had wings. So, anyway, I wanted to work on that, 'cause they seemed stuck in that position, so I figured the fascia were stuck.
So, the moment I laid on the table (face-down), I all the sudden felt this huge tightness in my trapezoid muscle, ESPECIALLY on my right side. I mean, I know those muscles are tight on me, but this was just crazyinsane tight, and it hurt. While he was feeling me out, those areas hurt like hell. Y'know, in that way that you kinda want things to hurt, 'cause they're being worked on, but fucking OUCH. So, he went to do the release on my shoulders. That was a lovely feeling. I could feel these really strong vibrations the whole time, and wasn't sure if they were physical or energetic, or some combination of the two, but it felt good, tingly, electric. He did this for a while, and commented on the heat/energy rising from my back. He then started working on my back.
That muscle on my right was just excruciating. He reminded me that he could work it all day, but unless I let him in, it wasn't going to work. So, I tried really hard to concentrate on my breathing, to remember to breath at all, to consciously try to let the energy flow. I tried to allow myself to make noise with it, crying out when it hurt. Always that is difficult for me, and is a huge part of Core - not keeping quiet. So, I tried, and was able to do some release that way. He used a heated percussion massager in that area for a long time, and that was pretty cool, and between all of it, it did seem to help. I noted that it being right-sided was probably telling, 'cause all the issues in my life now are about men. It also didn't escape either of us that this was the first time I'd been inside his house since
Logomancer chose to sever me from his life, and since he'd moved out of that house; I had certainly felt twinges, although the energy and the scent of the house are completely different now. Anyway, he worked on that area for a while, and I felt some release. It felt like fear to me, that area. That was the emotion elicited. The left side, while not nearly as tight, and not hurting as much, felt more like anger. The whole time I was on the table, these hurt. Less and less as time went on, of course, but it never fully went away. Trying to move made it worse.When he started working on my neck, the pain that had been there, and been a concern of mine wasn't even there. Hadn't been since I'd laid down, in fact. It was a nice relaxing massage there. I could feel things loosening, but nothing like fighting against the steel on my right side.
Since he'd spent the huge majority of a 90-minute session trying to deal with my right side, there wasn't much time for anything else, so I asked him to focus on my jaw when he flipped me over, since that was always an issue for me. Again, a big thing in Core - the jaw clenching in anger, in holding back the unsaid. Huge issue of mine. So, he did. There was definite loosening there.
When I got off the table, the pain in my back disappeared, and still hasn't come back. And it wasn't there until I got on the table. I'm not sure what that means. Mimicking the position, and the moves that caused pain during that time haven't elicited that pain again. But, the second I got off the table, the neck pain came back. I think that's just WEIRD.
On the way home, I was singing along to the radio, as I do, and tried working on opening my jaw, my voice, rather than holding it back. I was actually able to do it a couple of times. I was appalled, really. I'd gotten so used to the sound of my voice repressed, when it wasn't, it was startling to me. But, while there was a quality of openness to it that frightened me (too much energy! eek!), there was also a hoarseness about it, like there would be if one hadn't spoken in a very long time. That's kinda scary to me.
On the way home, I was hungry, and a little voice told me to go to Return to Eden, which is somewhere I rarely go, since Whole Foods is closer, and has that thing where I refill my 5-gallon water bottles. I'm not sure what I was supposed to find there, other than a FABULOUS selection of locally-made raw foods. I must go back and learn more about this. I'm really interested in pursuing that, but finances have very much gotten in the way of that. I need to figure out a way to make it a priority. With much skepticism I bought the raw version of salmon patties, which, while I wouldn't really compare them to salmon, were pretty good. I got a few other things, too, which were also good, and some wheatgrass for the cats. I then came home and ate while I surfed, watched some TV, and went to bed. (I had last night off.)
Today, I'm supposed to be calling
Dai_Syn, but I'm loathe to do so until I know for sure he's awake; the blonde beastie didn't get home until about 3am, and LuneNoire is still gone, presumably because of a flat tire that happened unexpectedly last night, that is being dealt with today. This may also affect whether or not Dai_Syn is available, so I'm just kinda hanging loose. I need to do laundry, at any rate, so I'll probably start that.Anyway, that's pretty much it for me right now. Have a lovely one.
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Date: 2006-07-15 06:54 am (UTC)