First off, I would like to say that this does not seem remotely offensive to me. I have had similar questions and theories about "bad stuff" rolling around in my head lately. Who's to say what's true for you has to be true for others, and vice versa? In giving your perspectives, you've given others something to think about.

Secondly, those instances were non-consensual sexual acts. Non-consensual sex=rape. In the first case, you were too out of it to object. When people get/are drugged and/or are raped unconsciously, are they still raped? Of course. In the 2nd...he knew you didn't want it and did it anyway. You reacted how you reacted, and should feel no shame. But it was still rape. But it gets so fuzzy...and you don't want to think of it as rape. I'm just learning how to release my inner demons, so I don't know how you should be feeling if you're really getting over it. But it took a lot for you to post this, so it sounds to me like you're on the road to recovery to me, however far you've gone. :)

Thirdly (and I may should have done this firstly), I was browsing through friends of friends journals, and I now feel compelled to add you as a friend :) Feel free to do the same.