BookOfMirrors (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
bookofmirrors) wrote2005-12-26 02:21 pm
bookofmirrors) wrote2005-12-26 02:21 pm
Weirdness
OK... not sure what's wrong with me today. For the past several days, really.
I'm restless, and wanting to do things, yet mostly unmotivated to do much of anything. At the same time, the stuff I wanna do that I'm not doing is bumming me out 'cause it's not done.
Also, Serendipity's party is today. I haven't missed one since I moved here, I don't think. Well, I think I was out of town for one, but we helped with the food that time, I think. But the idea of going to it makes me... I can't even describe it. Not quite panicky, not quite I-have-a-really-bad-feeling-about-this, just this almost visceral, very strong sensation of NOT wanting to be at a party. Not this one, not the NYE party I was invited to... not even the Scarletalia, which I was thrilled to have gotten an invitation to this year.
I'm just so NOT wanting to do anything group related. I picture going to a party, and my skin crawls. I picture meeting any of the persons who are hosting the party, or whom I might see at the party, one on one, and I'm totally OK with that. There's just something about parties for me right now. No idea what it is. Some weird alignment of stars, something.
But it's nothing personal against anyone. Just my own weirdness going on.
I'm restless, and wanting to do things, yet mostly unmotivated to do much of anything. At the same time, the stuff I wanna do that I'm not doing is bumming me out 'cause it's not done.
Also, Serendipity's party is today. I haven't missed one since I moved here, I don't think. Well, I think I was out of town for one, but we helped with the food that time, I think. But the idea of going to it makes me... I can't even describe it. Not quite panicky, not quite I-have-a-really-bad-feeling-about-this, just this almost visceral, very strong sensation of NOT wanting to be at a party. Not this one, not the NYE party I was invited to... not even the Scarletalia, which I was thrilled to have gotten an invitation to this year.
I'm just so NOT wanting to do anything group related. I picture going to a party, and my skin crawls. I picture meeting any of the persons who are hosting the party, or whom I might see at the party, one on one, and I'm totally OK with that. There's just something about parties for me right now. No idea what it is. Some weird alignment of stars, something.
But it's nothing personal against anyone. Just my own weirdness going on.